At Regina Mundi, the historic Roman Catholic church in Soweto, which features a stained-glass window depicting Nelson Mandela, prayers for him to be healed dominated entreaties to God this week. But, while schoolchildren said they were asking for him "to get out of hospital and come and visit us", not everyone was using the same words in the same way.

"Of late, healing has taken on a different notion," said Father Sebastian Rossouw, the assistant parish priest who conducts mass in the cavernous church every morning. "As Christians, who believe in life after death, healing does not necessarily mean physical healing. It can also mean death."

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The sentiment would be a relatively uncontroversial one in normal circumstances – Catholic doctrine holds life sacred from conception until death but is open to the idea that a natural end to suffering can be in the best interests of both an ill person and his family, even if that family encompasses a nation.

When you are dealing with Mandela, however, especially in Regina Mundi, a sense of responsibility makes the theological ground less sure. "The people of this parish feel there is something special in our connection with Mr Mandela because of the history of the church itself," said Rossouw. "There is a sense that our prayers have special meaning because it comes from this congregation."

Regina Mundi is just a few kilometres away from Mandela House, now a tourist attraction anchoring a commercialised Vilakazi Street. The church is famed as a venue where political meetings were held, sometimes on the back of the funerals of activists – meetings that played a key role in the downfall of apartheid.

Mandela himself lauded the special place the church holds and, in turn, has been incorporated into the church in more ways than one. Outside the doors, vendors sell T-shirts bearing his face and tile mosaics reading "Madiba". For some, he is a living saint; for others, a crucial part of their revenue stream.

Sanctuary
But it is the bullet holes that still pock some walls, where police used live ammunition to drive out students who sought sanctuary inside on June 16 1976, that tie the church most closely to the struggle and make some congregants believe that God perhaps listens more closely to what is said there than in many other places.

With that weight of history embedded in the very walls, the people who pray at Regina Mundi feel their duty keenly and fret about what it is they truly seek. That leads to introspection – and a division that illustrates the divide evident in the rest of the country.

"We have to offer some kind of spiritual guidance and support, and that is not an easy thing to do," Rossouw said. "One can be speaking to two people at the same time, and one is saying: 'Let him go, he's suffering', and the other one is saying: 'No, we should hold on to life as long as possible.' It is not something we can take a stance on; it is a grey area where we are at the moment."

Mandela's hospitalisation this week did not change the routine of the church; mass continued every morning at 8am, with exhortations to the faithful not to let cold weather keep them away, and the church was busily planning weddings and baptisms and generally seeing to the business of tending to a flock. Rossouw, a young priest much loved, especially by younger congregants, alternated between ­joking in Afrikaans and admonishing in English.

Despite repeated inquiries – and a not inconsiderable amount of media attention – the church did not hold special prayer meetings for Mandela, preferring to let individuals offer their requests as they saw fit.

Approach and prayers
In quiet moments, though, and especially during preparation for sermons, Rossouw said, he struggled with some of the most fundamental questions about the nature of prayer and an honest relationship with God.

"Asking for betterment may be selfish and prayer should not be selfish," he said. "Holding on is natural, but people don't like to see a loved one suffer. Praying for 'healing' is being very diplomatic, and we can argue that God can look within our hearts to see our intentions. Is that not being too diplomatic? Does God want us to be diplomatic? Prayer is also about being honest."

Rossouw considers it his responsibility to consider such questions and to interpret the Bible to proffer potential answers, but he believes all those who walk through the doors of the church are ultimately responsible for their own approach and prayers.

He is loath to generalise about the nature of those prayers but has noted a distinct change in tone since the previous time that Mandela was rushed to hospital, and particularly noticeable since the elder statesman's health first started to fail. At Regina Mundi, it seems, the bulk of people are finally ready to let go.

"I'm not sure what has changed. Is it because we are now asking: 'How many more times does he have to return to hospital? How many times do we need to see him suffer?'

"It is as if the questions have become about the toll it is taking on him, that he is now the one we should consider, rather than ourselves."